if my life had a book

Friendship..
Is there's any formula to solve probs involving friendship?

I do want to create friends,
it just that i afraid i would hurt them..
i'm not really good at mind-reading..
i'm not really good at making people laugh..
i'm not really good at listening..
i'm not really good at controlling my temper..
i'm not really good at praising..
and i really not good at faking smiles..

i afraid i won't understand them..
i afraid they got bored of me..

thinking of these..
i rather be a loner~~
the one who stuck with book 24/7..
the one who always keeping her head low..
the one who don't have any existence..

but i have created some..
some failed..
some..
just awesome!

the awesome one is really appreciated..
the happiness from it can't be expressed..
it's like a bliss~
if my life had a book,
i would write it in the biggest,
thickest writing…